St. Michael Prayer

St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle. Be our safeguard against the wickedness and snares of the devil. May God rebuke him, we humbly pray, and do, thou, O Prince of the Heavenly Host, by the Power of God, cast into hell satan and all of the evil spirits who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.

Glory to God in the Highest!

Monday, October 13, 2014


According to the Mirriam Webster Dictionary,
Fear is:
: "to be afraid of (something or someone)
: to expect or worry about (something bad or unpleasant)
: to be afraid and worried."

 Fear is the antithesis trust.

If I hadn't been forced to function today,
I would have sat down at Mass and done 
I was terrified.
I was actually shaking.
My hands were white, 
Fear overwhelmed me.

Why would anyone be so full of fear in this encounter with our God?

I don't know.  I can't explain it, but I can only say that I did not trust.

It's been over 3 months since I cantored at Mass the last time.
My daughter has been seriously ill this summer.
I have been her caretaker.
Since she lives in another city, I have not been able to participate in the ministries at Church.
Cantoring has been one of these ministries.
I'm not the strongest cantor at Church, but I will do.
I practiced the materials for the last 5 days.
I had trouble with a couple of pieces, but I thought they would work out.
When I got to church for rehearsal, I found out that the organist I was expecting wasn't there.
She had a sub.
I was nervous enough.
The organist is one man who, for whatever reason, intimidates me.
He's never been unkind.
I don't know why he intimidates me, but he does.
That didn't help my nervousness.
It only got worse.  
I had trouble hitting the high notes.
Things only went from bad to worse.
I wanted to sit and cry after Mass.
I was so ashamed.
I don't know the problem.
I just know that I was in a state of great anxiety and panic.
I prayed for help, but there was none.
I am still trying to sort this out.

Fear does not equal trust in God.

What I know:
I have never experienced such debilitating fear.

Ironically the psalm was Psalm 93:
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.      
He makes me lie down in green pastures;
he leads me beside still waters;      
he restores my soul.
He leads me in right paths
    for his name’s sake.
 Even though I walk through the darkest valley,
    I fear no evil;
for you are with me;
    your rod and your staff—
    they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
    in the presence of my enemies;
you anoint my head with oil;
    my cup overflows.
  Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
    all the days of my life,
and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord
    my whole life long.
God made me aware that I need to trust HIM completely. 

I didn't Trust today.

It's time to stop focusing on this.
The collective memory of a crowd is short.
I need to pick myself up, dust myself off, and start all over again.

I come to you in awe of Your greatness.
I thank You for all that You have done and given me.
I praise You!
I adore You!
Lord, I come to do Your Will.
I give You my fears and anxieties. 
I give You All that I am and will be.
I seek to do Your Will.
Help me to trust You, especially in times of fear.
I want to trust.
I need to trust.

Lord, I am Yours.
Help me.
Thank You!


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