Patience One of the 12 gifts of the Holy Spirit

Galatians 5:22
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness…

1 Thessalonians 5:14
And we exhort you, brethren, admonish the idlers, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.

Psalm 37:7
Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for him;
fret not yourself over him who prospers in his way,
over the man who carries out evil devices!

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth.  It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end.

I ponder patience.  Each time I enter the confessional, I say, “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.  I have been impatient, again.  I want to be patient, but I have a very hard time being patient.”   The proclamation of this sin does not come as a surprise to my confessor.  He looks me straight in the eye and says, “Mallory, you cannot give what you don’t have.  You must learn to be patient with yourself so that you can give this gift to others.  Pray for this gift.  It is a gift of God.  Without God, you cannot be patient.”
   
I ponder patience.  If I am to become more patient, I must begin with myself.  I must learn to be kind to myself.  I must learn to be patient with me.  I begin with prayer.
   
Holy Spirit, the gift of patience is a fruit of Your love.  Help me to become more patient with me.  Help me to develop this gift that I may give it freely to all, that Your Holy Will may be demonstrated in this gift of Your love.  Help me to slow down and celebrate the daily lessons of patience in my life.  I offer up my successes to You.  I offer up my failures to You.  I beseech You to be with me and help me to recognize Your gift of lessons as they happen.  Help me to bless those with whom I must be patient.  Help them to forgive me when I’m not patient.  Bless them for their forgiveness.  Bless me when I am patient.  Thank You, Most Holy Spirit.  Amen.

    I ponder patience.  The lessons begin.  As I drive on the highway that has a speed limit of 55 mph, I come up behind a car going 35 mph.  The road has become a single lane with no passing allowed.  My fingers clench the steering wheel until I am able to pass the car.  I glare at the driver.  The driver is a very old man who is driving.  His glasses are thick.  He has no teeth in his mouth. 

Oh, Holy Spirit.  Forgive me for not being patient with this old man.  it’s not fair, though!  if you want me to learn patience, I need other lessons, not this kind! 

I ponder patience.  The lessons continue.  I go to church.  There is only one parking space left in the lot.  I try to pull into single space that is left.  I cannot fit into the space because someone is taking up two spaces.  I am forced to park in the street.  I am growling as I walk back into the church parking lot.  I see a very old woman with a walker and  opening the door to her car.  I still growl, but it’s not as loud.  I offer to help her get into her car.  She tells me that she can do it herself.  I slink away.

Oh, Holy Spirit, must you test me this way?  Then you make me feel guilty because I am not being patient.  That’s not fair! 

I ponder patience.  I have tried so many times to be fully attentive during adoration and not allow distractions to take my mind away from the Eucharistic Presence.  I sit in the presence of my God, and my mind wanders.  I’m worried about my daughter.  I’m worried about the cost of two root canals and crowns that I need.  The gentleman sitting across the aisle from me is snoring, loudly, too.  I wish I had more friends.  Wait!  I’m NOT PAYING ATTENTION, AGAIN!!! 

Wait, I’m not being patient with me. 

So, Holy Spirit, is this the lesson of adoration? I had forgotten, I must be patient with me.  I must learn to love myself and open my heart to you so that I can learn the gift of patience.  Thank you for all of your lessons even as I sit here in the Presence of Jesus.  I surrender myself to You so that I might bear this fruit of  Your Love.  Thank You, Most Holy Spirit!

I ponder patience.  The lessons continue.